DR. UMMER
THE FOREMOST HISTORIAN OF THE DRUM WORLD
Come in, come in! Mind the cymbal stands.
Upon a most curious hour, you have wandered past the ornate iron gates and into the most singular, joyful sanctuary in all the realm of percussion.
Welcome, traveler, to the grand and eccentric chambers of The House of Dr. Ummer—celebrated far and wide as the world’s foremost historian of the drum. It is a lofty title, to be sure; yet the Doctor is ever eager to confess—with a sly whisper and a twinkle of mischievous delight—that he wears this crown largely because so few other mortals ever cared to claim it for their own.
This wonderfully peculiar manor stands for three reasons, and three reasons alone:
First, for your exquisite entertainment;
Second, for your curious education;
And third, for your plain, unashamed delight in every glorious thing that goes bump, boom, and brilliantly resonates in the echoing night!
The Definitive Book on Drums
A Comprehensive History of the Drum Kit
Dr. Ummer, PhD · 456 pages · History & Encyclopedia
The drum is the oldest instrument we have, and the modern kit is the great-great-grandchild of the human heartbeat. This is its complete story - from the frame drums of the ancient world and the cymbal foundries of old Constantinople to the electronic stage of today. You will laugh. You may even find your eyes tearing up. One thing’s for sure. You’ll know everything there is to know about the drum kit!
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Dr. Ummer
Who is?
No one has ever seen his face. No one knows his real name. What is known is this: Dr. Ummer, PhD, is the world's foremost - and probably only willing - historian of the drum kit, a scholar who narrates from behind a velvet curtain and has no intention of ever stepping out from it.
The PhD, he cheerfully admits, is the one of its kind - the one awarded by his three warring personalities: